Always You Read online

  “Now you have.” My voice trembled.

  “Yep.” He ran his hand to the back of his neck. “You’re beautiful, Maybelline.”

  I warmed from the sudden blush I knew I was wearing.

  Marching towards me, Willard took me into his tight embrace and when my lips fell by his ear, I whispered, “I’m ready, Willard, make love to me.”

  His mouth took mine and he circled us until he had me laid out on his bed. Watching his biceps bulge as he climbed on top of me, I welcomed his mouth once more to mine and I knew everything from today on would be changed forever.

  “May, babe, wake up.” Will pulls me out of my sleepy state.

  “Kiss me, Will,” I plead before he follows my request. “Still as good as the very first time,” I mumble, still half asleep.

  “I’m glad.” He chuckles. “What were you dreaming about? You looked so peaceful.”

  “Our first time in the bedroom...” I giggle.

  “Like, first time…first time.”

  “Yep.”

  He chuckles again. “I had no idea what I was doing.”

  “You did everything perfectly. It was very special,” I inform, finally opening my eyes to claim his. Good God, he’s amazing.

  “I wouldn’t say perfect, but it was definitely a pleasurable first time experience.”

  “We couldn’t get enough of each other after that day. Everything changed for the better.”

  “It did and you know every day I’ve still wanted you just as much.”

  “Willard, do you promise to still love me in the morning?”

  “And every morning after, Maybelline. I remember you saying that to me after and for about the next year.” He snickers.

  “Yes. I did.”

  “Maybelline, even when you’re gone, I’ll still love you in the morning and every morning. I promise.” He gulps.

  A tear stings fiercely as it pricks my eye. “I’ll be there, Willard. I’ll find a way to be there with you in the morning.” I begin to sob, covering my face with both my hands.

  “I know you will. Hey, come on, babe. Don’t cry. Please don’t cry.” Stopping this barrage of tears is impossible and before long I’m struggling to breathe through my nose. Panic hits me like a freight train and when Willard sits me up, he holds me closely. I still can’t catch my breath and darkness washes over my sight.

  “Lexis!” Will calls out frantically. “Lexis, come quick!” His voice grows faint until I can no longer hear a sound.

  Am I in water? The sound of splashing and the coolness to my cheeks has me frantically trying to surface. Where am I? My arms flap wildly. Please let me surface.

  “May-Day, you’re okay, sweetheart, you’re okay.” I can hear Mum’s voice as clear as day.

  “I can’t do this,” Willard roars. “I can’t face this anymore. It’s killing me, Lexis. It’s fucking killing me.” His cries are so pained. “Just make her all better and let me keep her. Make May better, for fuck’s sake. Do something, anything.” He’s howling, and I try even harder to pry my eyes open. “I’m not strong enough to handle this,” Willard babbles.

  “Willard. Stop this rot right this instance. You are strong. Get over here and be her saviour. You are May’s saviour.” Mum is stern in her instructions. “Get off the floor, Willard, now.” She continues scolding him before all I can hear is the sound of crying bringing me home. “Cliff, where is the ice? Get the fuck in here.” Her frustration radiates with this extreme tone.

  “Will!” I cry out. “Willard.”

  “I’m here, babe.” He’s sniffling when my eyes flutter open and I’m laid across Mum’s arms.

  “Woman, I was going as fast as I can,” Dad scolds.

  “She’s okay. Have you called Doctor Brown?” Mum’s quick to add.

  “He’s on his way.”

  “Good. Now get Willard sorted…May needs him.”

  “Come on, mate, let me help you.”

  “Cliff.” Will’s voice is whiney and desperate.

  “I know, mate. I’ve got you. You just hold on to me. I won’t let you fall. I’ll always have you, son, you’re my boy.”

  My heart is nurtured by the hands of pure comfort. My dad is the best man and Willard is so much like him. They will be okay. It will be okay. Trying to sit upright is made difficult by the fact Mum keeps trying to push me down. “Let me see them,” I breathe.

  When I clap my eyes on the two strongest men in my life embracing, my lip quivers. Every day is getting harder now and emotions are running at an all-time high.

  “Willard, Sylvia and Alex are on their way, okay?”

  Will doesn’t answer. He simply lies silently in my dad’s arms.

  Doctor Brown does a thorough examination and when he places a Doppler against my stomach he locates the baby’s heartbeat without any issue. “It’s strong, May, just like you.” His apricot business shirt takes my attention as he leans down in front of me, and I’m not sure if all his shirts have had embroidery above the pocket, and I’ve not noticed, or if it is just this one, but looking at the cursive lettering I read, ‘In life, we must trust.’ I like this embroidery.

  “Maybelline, can you hear me?”

  I nod my head.

  “You’re okay, it was just another spell.”

  “She’s been having a lot of these the last couple of weeks as you know...Doctor, is it going to get worse?” Mum’s tone is strained.

  “I’m afraid it probably will. It’s advancing quickly.”

  “Her list.” Will huffs from beside the bedroom dresser.

  “List. Yes. I’d suggest you do as many as you can and as quickly as you can.”

  “Right,” Will snaps rudely.

  I want to tell him to be kinder, but he’s having a rough day, there is no doubt about it.

  “The baby. We’ve made twenty-six weeks. If she delivers, there is a chance of survival for the baby like Doctor Saunders said, right?”

  “A chance, yes.”

  “I’m worried she can’t hold on for much longer, Doctor Brown.”

  “Willard, how about you and I go and sit in another room and have a chat. Maybelline is doing very well considering the circumstances and I want you to be able to ask me what you need to, but we don’t want Maybelline doubting herself. She’s doing a terrific job. We are best to put your mind at ease in another room.”

  “I know.” His head shakes as he pinches the bridge of his nose.

  “Come on. I think you just need a chat.”

  “May.” Will’s eyes locate mine.

  “Go. I’m fine, Willard. I promise.”

  “I won’t be long.”

  “I know. I’ll be here in bed waiting for you.”

  Will nods his head, and with a gentle touch to my arm, Doctor Brown winks before leaving.

  “Do you want some water, May-Day?” Mum is trying to make herself useful.

  “Yes, please, Mum.”

  “I won’t be long. Plus, I think Gem just pulled up. I’m sure I heard her car pull into the drive.”

  “Fantastic.”

  What a day? I guess unpredictability is a certainty from here on out. Folding my pillow over my head, I try to block out the replay of Willard’s earlier breakdown, but I can’t. It’s tearing me apart.

  “Really, do you think passing out all the time is fun? I think you’re just being selfish, taking all these deep peaceful sleeps.” Allowing the pillow to fall away, I spy Gem holding a vanilla malt milkshake, my new favourite delight in one hand and a picture of Matthew McConaughey turned upwards in the other. “I thought if I brought another one of these photos of him for you, you might just try and stay conscious to stare at him awhile.” Her eyes roll and I laugh at this display sitting more upright. Gem always knows how to make me laugh. “Girl, really, these calls at work about you suck major balls.”

  “I know,” I mouth.

  “Do you, though? I mean, talk about a heart leaping out from one’s mouth moments. It’s an epic sensation.”
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br />   “I’m sorry,” I whisper.

  “But are you really?”

  “Stop it.” I huff before giggling.

  “Here, kiss your other lover and drink your malt.”

  “Thank you, pretty lady.”

  “Don’t pretty lady me. My pants are getting tight because now I want to drink malts all the time because of you and I’m packing on the beef.” Undoing the top button of her long business pants has her stretching out across the bed.

  “How was work?”

  “Fine.”

  “Just fine?”

  “Yep.”

  “Okay.” Let’s try another approach. “How’s John-John?” The smile that tugs at her lips is giving away the secrets I think she’d like to keep to herself for now. “You two are a thing? I’m right, aren’t I?” I suck at the straw poking out of the takeaway lid, receiving a delicious mouthful of milky goodness in return for my efforts.

  “I’m not telling you.”

  “That’s a bit mean, don’t you think?”

  “Nope. If I don’t tell you then you’ll keep wondering what’s happening between us and this means you’ll stay put, earthbound, and not leave me. See, it’s fantastic logic.”

  “Why do you think I’d care anyway?” I try to stamp out her very well thought out logic.

  “Ha. You’re nosy, that’s why.”

  Wrapping her arm around my neck, Gem pulls me against her shoulder. “Nosy posy Maybelline. You like to know about shit.”

  “Who doesn’t?”

  “Now that’s true.”

  Gem chatters about random happenings. Mainly about the new park bench going into the park not far from mine and Willard’s tree. She also informs me that the money raised for us is sitting at one hundred and ten thousand dollars. I’m completely floored by this information. The community of Wellington are wonderful people to do such a thing for us.

  “Hey, May, do you know if we are still going to the television station this afternoon now or not?” Gem delivers this question with ease before she wraps her lips around the straw of my malt, stealing a mouthful.

  “Television station…” I narrow my eyes. “News to me.”

  “I see. Well, you’d better get your lazy arse out of bed if you plan on marking off being the assistant on a game show from your Fuck-it Bucket List.”

  “What are you talking about?”

  “John set it up. At four-thirty p.m. they’re filming ‘Now You See it, Now you Don’t.’”

  “I love that show.”

  “I know and you’re going to be the game show chick, so let’s get you up.”

  “Me.” I point my finger to my chest, causing Gem to purse her lips before nodding. “Yes, I want to do this. Are you kidding? Okay, I’m getting up. Hang on. I’ve nothing to wear to be a hostess on a game show.”

  “I believe you do there.”

  “I do?”

  “Yes.”

  “Well, why didn’t you start with that? Let’s go. Rally the troops, I have a strike to add to my list.”

  “I thought as much.”

  “It is raining cats and dogs out there, babe,” Willard proclaims as the last layer of gloss is applied by a professional makeup artist.

  “That bad, hey?” I smack my lips together before folding a tissue in half and placing it between them.

  “It is.” Watching him eye me in the mirror surrounded in lights has me instantly smiling. “You look stunning.”

  “Thank you.” I’m smitten. I love Willard when he looks at me like this.

  “Look at your hair all pinned up like that.”

  “You like?”

  “A lot.”

  “Good. Hey, I chose the navy dress. Do you think it looks good?” Slowly standing to my feet with the help of Pierre, the man responsible for my new attire, I wait for his reply.

  “It is a very good choice.” Moving forwards, Willard places his hand over the satin material falling from my obvious baby bump. “Are you excited?”

  “Nervous…blah.” My tongue hangs from my open mouth.

  “Don’t be. You’ll do a good job.”

  “All I have to do is help the contestants up to the podium, and off if they miss the question, smile, and hand over the winner’s cheque at the end. I mean, I can’t really stuff this up, right?”

  “You won’t.” He kisses my temple. “Go be the superstar we know you are.”

  “I haven’t seen John-John to thank him.”

  “They haven’t arrived yet. They’re a few streets away. You can tell him at the end, okay?”

  I nod.

  “Okay, Miss Maybelline, we are ready for you.” Pierre locks his arm in mine. “Go sit down, Mr. Willard.” Pierre’s feminine tone and soft nature makes me fall instantly head over heels for him. Seriously, he is the sweetest man and he’s marrying his love Dexter next weekend. He informed me of this while doing my hair. This thought had me sighing in contentment. A grand American wedding he told me. I wish he could marry his love in his home country, yet our laws in Australia don’t allow such a thing, yet. I hope one day they will, even though I won’t be here to witness the occurrence.

  The game show music plays and Grant Simons is introduced as the host, causing butterflies to take flight from the pit of my stomach and flutter into my throat. I think I’m going to be sick.

  “We have a very special assistant for you today, Grant,” the deep audio voice over says.

  “Really?” He plays to the crowd in an excitable tone.

  “Please welcome the lovely Maybelline Connors.” Stepping out onto the over lit stage, I want to shield my eyes from the overly bright lights, but I don’t and make my way to the spot I was told to stand on in a simple rehearsal when I made it to the set. I probably should have used the wheelchair like Willard suggested, but I wanted to walk the stage in all its glory.

  “Hello, Maybelline,” Grant says, his black hair combed to the side, his suit pressed and well-tailored.

  “Good evening, Grant, thank you for having me assist you this evening.” I nailed my line even if my throat was quaking slightly.

  “It’s our pleasure. Now we can see you’re having a baby. Congratulations!”

  “Thank you.” My pride is obvious as I place my hand upon my bump.

  Taking my hand to his, he kisses my cheek and whispers, “We are all fighting with you, May.” A tear stings my eye and my throat strains as I try desperately to keep it contained. “Thank you,” I whisper.

  Taking his position in a chair in the centre of the stage, I finally shift my sight in the audience’s direction. There are so many faces, but I don’t miss my cheer crew in their white shirts with hot pink writing. John made it and blows me a kiss from the front row. I love John-John so much for giving me this experience. Mr. Hollywood.

  I expected the game show would drag on standing for so long on my bung leg, but it doesn’t. I think I went numb from the exhilaration I was experiencing.

  “Okay, this is the last question, Telitha. If you get this puzzle right you will take home twenty-five thousand dollars. If you don’t, you will go home empty-handed.” I think I’m more nervous for Telitha than she appears to be for herself.

  “Okay,” she mumbles as I watch her glasses slide down from her head to her eyes once more and she directs her attention to the large puzzle board on the wall. Telitha is the fifth contestant to take the stage tonight and I’m cheering internally for her to win.

  The puzzle jumbles on the screen and with the computer touchscreen in front of her she begins shifting the pieces around. The tricky part about this game is, at unexpected times, certain pieces disappear and then return without warning. Sometimes the entire puzzle disappears and when you have sixty seconds to solve it, it’s very difficult to do so. Every time the puzzle completely disappears, the game show host says, ‘Now you see it. Now you don’t.’

  But luckily for Telitha, she managed to shift five pieces before anything disappeared and without hesitation, she smacks her hands
to the red buzzer in front of her and yells, “Ayres Rock, the picture is of Ayres Rock.”

  I almost squeal with delight because I know she’s right.

  “Correct,” Grant announces with exaggeration, and I can’t help it. I clap. How could I not?

  Handing over the giant oversized cardboard cheque was an amazing feeling. If I were given more time I’d think I would’ve loved doing a job like this. It’s such an amazing experience. The cheering from the crowd is loud and the music begins to play, closing out the show.

  “And we are done!” a man from behind one of the cameras that lines the stage shouts.

  I breathe a sigh of relief before congratulating the winner once more.

  “Maybelline, we have something we’d like to give you.” Grant is quick to my side.

  “Me?” My head launches backwards.

  “Yes.”

  Standing in the middle of the stage, my heart gallops, my stomach knots, and my eyes search before locating my husband in the audience. I mouth, “What’s happening?”

  He simply smiles in return.

  A large bouquet of flowers is brought onto the stage by the regular game show assistant. I watch when I manage to turn the show on. In the other hand she holds an oversized cardboard cheque and a frame.

  “Maybelline, we would like to present you this award for excelling as a game show host on ‘Now you see it, Now you don’t.’ I believe Willard said this marks off your number eight request on your bucket list.”

  Tears are definitely messing up my mascara because they are leaking from my eyes quickly.

  “Also, here is a cheque…” He accepts it from Britta, the normal assistant for the game show. “For twenty-five thousand dollars, May, so you can complete everything on your list.”

  My hand shakes as I place it over my mouth, holding in the surprised gasp that wants to escape.

  Willard is quickly by my side and I instinctively turn into his chest for comfort.

  “Thank you, thank you, thank you…” Will repeats over and over. His voice shakes with surprise.